So, I had every intention of writing this yesterday, but I was so exhausted that I completely wimped out. So a little something has been bothering me, and I definitely just need to get it out there. I will admit, I had a teeny bit of that stereotype of military wives never working, and just getting to hang out with the kids all day eating bon bons or whatever (i’m totally kidding fellow wives, i definitely didn’t think you ate bon bons all day long, wink)…. so let me backtrack a little….
I actually became a SAHM (stay at home mom) for a bit back when i was first in Missouri, i was pregnant, lonely, eating, couldn’t find a job, and had no friends…. wow, pretty picture right there… so when Scarlett was born I still hadn’t found any work and was scared about daycare, so i was officially a SAHM. It lasted about a year, and I was officially going crazy and needed to get out of the house. I found some part time work at a retail store, not bad, daycare wasn’t costing too much and I finally felt okay for her to go, being a year old and all.
Fast forward to us moving to Colorado, I was looking for work for about 4 months and finally found some retail work. I was super excited because I had gotten a position with PacSun, loved the team, was super excited about the future opportunities, etc. Well…. Tim then talks to me about him deploying sometime this year, and all of the field exercises they will be doing this year…. for those of you who don’t know, when they go into the field they are usually gone for about a week, and have limited access to a phone… so now I’m thinking…. whoa whoa whoa…. you’re going to be gone a week? about once a month??? It gets better… there will be two separate months that he is gone for more than 30 days…… i’m sorry what? Guess who’s missing Missouri right about now? THIS girl. Now let me ask you…. retail… crazy hours… schedule changing all the time… how is this going to work for me??? So after long discussions with my team at PacSun I decide it probably wont work with me taking the promotion… its just not fair to everyone that I get an opening shift M-F all these times… (because remember, i have to abide by daycare hours)…. so I ask you this…. that military wife that you think just sits around at home not wanting a career…. why doesn’t she just work?? chances are her life is run by her husband’s schedule.
There are certain posts/assignments that are a bit more the norm, have normal hours, are more flexible with letting our guys go if they need to pick up the kids etc… but not here… and NOT when you are deploying within the year. I have never been to this kind of post, all I know is how it was at Fort Leonard Wood…. grass is always greener aye? Not so much over here
I at this point am thinking of other options, should I go back to teaching, should I look for another job, a 9-5er? start my own business? That would be the best option, i wouldn’t have to pay for daycare!! Do you know that is running us about 600-800 a month!?!?! (depending on my schedule)…. lemme tell you something…. my paycheck is barely paying that!
So all I am saying is do NOT judge…. foot in mouth, insert now.
It is very hard to begin to realize that you chose a life where your husband’s job is more important than yours, you make sacrifices by leaving your family and friends, but it is also a sacrifice in a bit about who or what you can become, your career is essentially on hold, and for the first time I am realizing just what being a military wife entails.